all u can eat

i hold an expectation that people are aware of others yet i know that's just silliness. i realize too that my standards of public behavior are not universal. tonight i'm gonna limit this to: eating on the mbta.

it's dirty, smelly and usually crowded. it's infested with rats, bugs and often reeks of homeless guy pee. how is that a place you wanna eat?

if it's rush hour, you will likely have to stand and be smushed. does that seem a good place to bring a snack? is it something pungent? does it need 2 hands or utensils?

i have no problem with cups of coffee or tea. soda in the morning grosses me out, but hey, i guess it's caffeine. i can tolerate bagels, muffins... maybe donuts, but why would anybody ever eat one to break fast? yuk. nuts, pretzels, candybars... i'm all about the unobtrusive.

recently:

girl standing up eating cheez whiz nachos out of a plastic to-go shell. near-by riders trying to avoid getting their hair in her mess.

2 girls with an open pizza box on the seat in front, stuffing their stoned faces.

old lady with a plastic bag holding something fried and droopy that needed a fork and lots of wiping her face with her sleeve. it smelled like stewed old goat.

gaggle of guys with sausage sandwiches.

assorted college kids with burger schwing/mcslop stuff that stunk to bejeesus.

family (tourists) with ice cream cones.

gah.

but this morning i saw a freakish thing. 7:30. she was already seated and eating a bagel with cream cheese. she looked big but whatevah. i was still too sleepy to read, so people-watched. she then licked off each finger of her eating hand and sucked her thumb with the determination of an infant. it was so disturbing i had to look away. and keep looking back. then she unwrapped a huge muffin. which she split and smeared with butter. licked her hand again and sucked her thumb some more. THEN pulled out a croissant, smeared THAT with cream cheese and downed that bit of caloric misery. a croissant with cream cheese? who'da thunk? then more thumb-sucking.

it was all in dunkin-donuts bags, so she had at least 10 bucks worth of processed worthless food in her system before the stock market opened. god only knows what she ate before she got on the t. her oral fixation was so disturbing i can't shake it. she was late 20s and nobody calls her on that thumb-sucking thing? ew.

i was happy about the apple in my bag. i was happy i can think of other things to suck with ardor.